And on the third day God created… aliens (???)

Two years ago during the school year, we spent most mornings going through somewhat of a Bible study drawing pictures about the particular story we had read and then discussing it. Dee and Gracie were 4 at the time and their participation was not at the level as Halle, but still we all enjoyed this part of the day. We used the entirety Egermeier’s Bible Story Book and The Jesus Storybook Bible as our sources. All the completed pictures were placed in page protectors and then they all went into a large 3″ D-ring binder. It was truly a work of art (in a mother’s eyes…) to go back and look through it. The girls each had their own section, and when we looked at Halle’s drawings we could retell each story and they seemed to really grasp the big picture of it all. Oh, and I did this along with them, but I won’t be posting any of my work :-)

I thought it would be so good to do that again this summer as part of a morning devotional with the girls. I also thought it would be fun to see how the girls’ drawings and writing have changed over the years. But Dee (my sweet girl with whom I often wonder where her mind wanders) still has the most intriguing drawings and I wanted to share.

This set of drawings is from the first day that we started up again this summer.
We read the 1st chapter in the Egermeier’s Bible about the week of creation.

This odd thing is from Dee. I don’t recall discussing anything about a flying creature with multiple antennae, but maybe I did???

This is from Halle. She wanted to make sure every day of creation was accounted for in her picture.

This is from Gracie. She was trying to show how in the darkness, God spoke light into being.

And then this set of pictures is from the day we read ‘Jesus shows His love’ from two years ago.

This is Halle’s. I would have her write up a summary of what we read on her pictures.

This is Gracie’s. The bottom part was ‘Jesus shows His love’ and the top part was ‘The Last Supper’

This is from Dee. The bottom half is from ‘Jesus shows His love’ and the top half is ‘The Last Supper’

I love these all! Even if after two years it doesn’t seem that the coloring and artful interpretations has evolved very much. They will be priceless treasures and I am hoping I can do something like this each and every year the girls are at home with me.

unabridged parenting (rambling thoughts in an unabridged post)

Have you ever read “The Count of Monte Cristo?”

If not, I highly recommend you do so because it is an absolutely amazing adventure story. Many say the best one ever written!

There is even a Great Illustrated Classics version which you could finish in about 45 minutes if you wanted a quick read. With that very shortened account, you would still get the page-turning pleasure of a great story and the deep feel of betrayal and desire for revenge that the main character wrestles with. Or if you wanted something more comprehensive, but just didn’t feel up to reading 1000+ pages, there are versions between 400 and 900 pages that you could bury yourself in and still enjoy thoroughly.

Whatever level of depth you desired to acquaint yourself with this wonderful work of literature, there is some version/translation out there to meet your intention. If it would be perfectly fine for you to only read a children’s narrative, then great. If you just want to watch a movie rendition, then good for you. The point is, you have options and you can choose them. If you are after convenience and still want a taste for what readers of the original have appreciated, you can attain that.

But here’s the deal. What if you really wanted to read the full length version and you set out to do so. And what if you did not know you had to hunt hard for the real thing because you were not aware of the fact that there were abridged versions out there (or versions that called themselves unabridged, but seriously chopped up the story, removing sections the translator thought were not relevant and replaced descriptive words with other choices that were far less than superior – believe me, they exist)? And what if even the most renowned bookstores only carried the abridged versions or the altered versions, and did not label them as such? Then you might never perceive that you devoted your time and energy into something you were not really seeking. It would be a rather tragic discovery to know you had invested much focus and hope into an endeavor but then, far too late, realized that a much greater fulfillment could have been yours, had you only known. Even though what you had poured your self into was still a great delight, you might feel the loss of a possible reward knowing that a compromise was unintentionally made.

Maybe I might be thinking too much about something that seems rather trivial. Because really, when reading an abridgment, the implications are not THAT severe.

But when I started to think about how this might be analogous to life in some way, there was something really worth considering more on. I wondered if there were certain areas of my life (important ones) that I was diminishing because I was living out only an abridged version, and I was not really aware that I was doing so.

***********
abridge [uh-brij] verb
to shorten by omissions while retaining the basic contents. to reduce or lessen. diminish. to deprive. cut off.
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In my story, I make sure to get through the chapters on school time (spelling, math, reading, history), Bible time, making nutritious meals, grocery shopping with in budget, bed making, vacuuming, laundry (well, I do skim through that one), dishes, chores with the girls, rest time for all; all those parts that seem necessary and important in terms of getting things done. But I am realizing that I am a poor editor if I skip through the moments of appeared nothingness with my children because they don’t seem to serve an obvious purpose. I once came across a comment that said reading an abridged version is like removing part of the soul of the story. And I fear that is what I have been unintentionally doing; shortening the story and removing part of the soul of parenting.

Just the other day, Halle wanted me to sit with her and look at a princess book we had checked out from the library. She didn’t want me to read it, but just be together on the couch and admire the beautiful dresses and talk about which parts we liked best. But I was ‘busy’ and shooed her off. I had things to do in the kitchen. The laundry buzzer had also just gone off and it was about to be a very busy evening of driving kids to and from 3 different dance classes. No, it was not the best use of my time, because it was not being very productive. Or so I thought.

That next morning, when I was out in the den reading and with my cup of coffee, the ignored princess book was on the table in front of me, reminding me of choices from the previous night. It made me realize that, in my haste to get through the must-dos of the day, I missed an opportunity to just be with Halle.

I was so saddened by this and thus determined there must be a change!

It isn’t too late to do something. I want to take the time for rich and extensive character development with my girls, to go deep with their thoughts and their desires. I refuse to only do what ‘seems’ to be the most productive and the best use of my time. All moments are important, relevant, and profitable to the underlying story. I want the elation of a rich and profound ending because I have taken it all in. The fast paced and the tangibly constructive aren’t the only elements that make for a gratifying experience. The slow (seemingly uneventful) moments with my girls are just as precious and I want to make sure they are all left in my parenting story. They might not be obvious, so I will need to look hard for them. But I desperately do want that unabridged version of parenting!

Just look at all the possible joy and fulfillment that awaits!

God is a lavish giver!

Bottom Line On Top: For the first time ever, I prayed before I left this morning that I would have a good run. And much to my surprise (and joy and praise back to God) I did!

I didn’t really have specifics about what “good” would entail. I just knew that the last two weeks I had been out running and would go to log my workout on the daily mile, it would have seemed fitting for violins to be playing a sad song in the background as I recapped my miserable run and hoped for sympathy at what I had to endure. But not today! I just felt happy the whole time (and I had to run 8 1/2 miles). The heat and humidity didn’t feel quite so intense, I saw hot air balloons flying high off in the distance, I was enjoying listening to my audible book, ‘The Count of Monte Cristo’, and my body felt great (not tired and winded in the least). My mind was in a happy place and it was so enjoyable. Even over the last couple of miles, when I started listening to music, there was still a surplus of energy and I would often look down at my garmin and see that my pace was too fast for this run. Having to tell myself to ‘slow down jo’ was just an extra bonus to such a great morning. I was simply amazed!

And if you have any desire to know why I would ask (or why I had never asked before) read below. I have been learning some amazing things about the generous heart of our loving Father and his desire to give good things to His children; and how prayer connects those two attributes, all the more allowing us access to experience His ever caring presence in our lives.

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…You do not have because you do not ask (James 4:20)

Maybe it was my friend Angela’s own words or maybe she was quoting from the book, “A Praying Life” by Paul Miller that we are going through this summer, but the comment “God is a lavish giver” really impacted me in a new way this past week.

One of the chapters we discussed last Thursday focussed on the struggle most believers have with asking God for any and all things. Sure I pray for requests I believe to be of eternal significance. I have no hesitation for prayers that God would reveal His truth to my children and for assurance of their salvation, or for friends and family and their growing faith in difficult times. But apart from such prayers like safety in travel, a family that loves the Lord and one another, and employment for Rob, I have rarely come to the Lord with real personal petitions that reside deep in my heart and matter specifically (and somewhat selfishly) to me.

Running and my faith have mostly been two separate worlds for me. I had linked them together once when I reflected on what my running teaches me about faith with this post: “everything I need to know about life I learned from running“. But that was as far as it went, and I never invited God to join me in my running or to bless my running. Even when I was 2 weeks away from my last marathon and feeling very sick and crappy, I was reluctant to ask God for healing and a recovered body that would be fit and prepared to run 26.2 miles. My rationale was that the sickness could be a good teaching moment for me. I summed up my slow time believing that perhaps God was trying to reveal that my affections and desires were more for my goals as a runner than my faith in Him, or it was to keep me humble, or maybe it was to teach me about finding joy in Him in the midst of disappointment and defeat in the world. And while that could very well be true (God does want to be Lord of our life and wants to grow our character), I was missing another truth about God.

If you… know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him! (Matthew 7:11)

The book, ‘A Praying Life’ has made me aware that I have an unbalanced faith in God. I see Him as infinite and all-powerful and good, but I never let the Biblical truths that He is personal and interested in me sink in and affect the prayer part of my relationship with Him. A sad point was made in one of the chapters when it stated, “deep down, we just don’t believe God is as generous as he keeps saying he is.” And how disappointingly true that observation is in my own praying : ( It is so evident that there are way too many areas in my life that are prayerless because I don’t ask to see the goodness of God in them. So now, I am trying to learn knew things from this and make changes in how I pray. I want to be continually lifting up prayers that reveal I believe whole-heartedly in the generosity of God and the gifts He would love to bestow! And rather than simply making assumptions about what I should be learning or how I can see God at work through my circumstances, I should rather be praying for things (anything, God already knows what I want anyways) and THEN allow Him reveal to me through those prayers what He wants me to understand about Him and His plans for me and others.

So today, before I set out for my scheduled long run, I asked for a good 8.5 miles. I have been missing that joy I used to have when running for some time now and desperately wanting it back. But I never brought that before the Lord. My rationale was how purely selfish it was and that I should instead be focussing on how suffering through a training program could teach me necessary lessons on perseverance and steadfastness in my faith. But how limiting of the Lord is that! Just as God does indeed want me to learn and grow in my faith and character, He also wants to bless me. He is a lavish giver!! I need to be asking for all things near to my heart and THEN see how God is at work in those requests.

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful & thankful
(Colossians 4:2)

Would I have had a good run without praying? Maybe. Some might say I was ‘giving God credit to what would have happened anyway.’ And maybe I wont have a good run every time I pray for it. But because I am including God in my wishes for my running, I am able to see Him at work in that area of my life – at times He will bless me with an enjoyable outing and others He will want to impress upon my heart other things about perseverance and faith in the harder times. But I get to see all of that when I pray. And I don’t have to figure out how this all works, I am just called to “ask boldly and yet surrender completely” as I trust in the Lord.

Running with Joy

Today was a great running day!

The temperature was perfect. The sun shone bright in a near cloudless sky. My ipod was playing my favorite songs for speed. But best of all, my girls were right there to cheer me on as I ran by them SIXTEEN times!!

To explain why I am even posting this, I am sure I could write another long-winded post to bring folks up to speed with some new running goals I have; one where I include way too many words and a ton of thoughts that ramble on (but if you like that kind of stuff, don’t worry, I will do all that further down). But for the first part, I’ll just try to limit information to bullet points that share what got me to today’s little running experience. Then you blog skimmers out there can ignore the rest of the post at the end : )

*I now have a crazy dream that I want to run the Boston Marathon
*my first marathon time was 4 hours and 4 minutes
*that (sadly) will be a qualifying time for the Boston Marathon when I am 50 years old!
*I would like to run it before I turn 40 : )
*to do this, my qualifying time needs to be run in 3 hours and 45 minutes (or less)
*that means I have to shave 20 minutes off my fastest marathon (or an hour off my slowest)
*ha! not this year!!
*but to do this someday means I need to train to be faster
*according to lots of guides, faster running can come from speed interval training
*an example of interval training is this. run 400 meters (1/4 mile) 8 times really fast
*I have three kids at home with me all day
*to run daily means I have to run in the morning, in the dark before Rob leaves
*because I need to see my watch, I can’t do speed intervals in the dark – drats!
*so I need a time to do intervals during the day, but how? I have kids with me
*there is a remote part of our neighborhood with 1/2 mile stretches
*I could be comfortable leaving my girls a short distance away from me while I run
*200 meters (1/8 mile) is an OK amount
*hmmmmm
*perhaps I could take them with me
*let’s see!

So we tried it out and it was a great success! I loaded up the girls with me and had them bring books to look at in the van while I was going to run. They were very OK with this request and then went above and beyond my expectations for their behavior. I wasn’t expecting to have a cheering squad, but boy did I ever!! I clocked out a 200 meter stretch of road. I told the girls they could stay in the van or right by the van on the sidewalk. They opted for the sidewalk and was I suprised that every time I ran by them (twice to make one interval and I had to run 8 intervals today) they cheered like crazy! It was so motivating and the smile on my face must have been huge. These speed intervals are HARD, but with their encouragement, I endured with much joy. I will definitely be trying this out again and again because I am already convinced of the positive effects it should have on training. And I love this time with the girls. Their excitement certainly lifts my spirits and fills my soul.

well that concludes the ‘short’ part of the post
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now on to the extra bit of running information…

This is what I am training for. First, there is the Austin Statesman Capital 10K on April 11th. And I’ll let that race result determine the paces I use to train with for the next marathon I do. There are these race time equivalent calculators on the internet that tell me in what time I need to run a race to reach future goals.

For example:
If I want to run a marathon in less than 4 hours (a 9 minute, 9 second mile) then I need to be able to run a 10K in 51 minutes and 8 seconds (an 8 minute, 14 second mile).

And if I want to go to Boston before I am 40 and run a marathon in 3 hours and 45 minutes (an 8 minute, 35 second mile), then I need to be able to run a 10K in 47 minutes and 56 seconds (a 7 minute, 43 second mile) ——- (you can see that seconds matter big time!!)

So I am going to shoot for my best, now that I am trying to incorporate speed intervals and tempo runs into my training, and see what happens. Then I’ll use those results to plan for the next marathon that I want to do, which is coming up this October in New Braunfels. It is called ‘chosen: marathon for adoption‘. I am certain that I will not be able to meet even a goal of under 4 hours with this one (because of the heat), but I will still follow a training program that gets me ready. It is for such a great cause that I really want to support, so I will gladly forego my vow of never again attempting a marathon in Texas unless it is winter. I had a really negative experience with marathon #2 this last Nov and I attributed my slow pace and my hitting the ‘wall’ at mile 18 to several factors like high temperatures and a sickness the week prior. But if I want to be able to prepare myself for a race with guaranteed high temperatures (for me, high is anything above 65) I need to quit my whining and learn to just push through the heat and fatigue. Last training, I just kind of did some light la la la running during the week and only followed the program when it came to the weekend long runs. And that was not providing me with enough miles, and hence endurance, to be fully ready. So these next 8 months, I’ll be logging up the miles much more and hopefully increasing my speed. Because to be a better runner, I have to run more. And to be a faster runner, well then, I have to learn to run fast.

And so…
that is what I am going to do!

Thanks to anyone that read through to the end. I don’t have much in the area of running buddies and wish that I did, because I love to talk running and would love to find folks to have fellow encouragement with. I recently was introduced to a new site called the daily mile, so if you become my friend on this, we could motivate each other with our running : ) It is very much like facebook, but for people posting comments about the miles they logged for the day.

Valentine’s Day – Remembering the One who 1st Loved us…

last year’s card had pictures of the girls. But this year, I used pictures the girls made themselves. A friend of ours had sent out a Valentine card using her children’s heart art work; I just loved that idea (and her template as well)!! So thanks, Jara (if you get to see this) for being the main influence of this year’s card!

my most favorite Christmas devotional

Below is copied from one of Ken Gire’s meditations in his book, ‘Intimate Moments with the Savior.‘ I absolutely adore this and read it several times throughout the Christmas season. I decided to read through it with Halle the other day and got even more choked up than usual. As I needed to explain the meaning of the bigger words to her, it just hit home even deeper in my understanding realities of the glory and wonder of the birth of our Emmanuel.

So if your heart is pining for a truly wonderful narrative of that first Holy night, then you’ll want to read on. Sit down, get cozy, and grab your cup of coffee (or your can of Dr Pepper or your glass of wine _{if it is in the pm and that is your thing…}) and let your heart embrace these powerful words.

Scripture-

In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. And everyone went to his own town to register.
So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of Danid, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firtborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.
Luke 2:1-7

Meditation-

For the census, the royal family has to travel eighty-five miles. Joseph walks, while Mary, nine months pregnant, rides sidesaddle on a donkey, feeling every jolt, every rut, every rock in the road.

By the time they arrive, the small hamlet of Bethlehem is swollen from an influx of travelers. The inn is packed, people feeling lucky if they were able to negotiate even a small space on the floor. Now it is late, everyone is asleep, and there is no room.

But fortunately, the innkeeper is not all shekels and mites. True, his stable is crowded with his guests’ animals, but if they could squeeze out a little privacy there, they were welcome to it.

Joseph looks over Mary, whose attention is focused on fighting a contraction. “We’ll take it,” he tells the innkeeper without hesitation.
The night is still when Joseph creaks open that stable door. As he does, a chorus of barn animals makes discordant note of the intrusion. The stench is pungent and humid, as there have not been enough hours in the day to tend the guests, let alone the livestock. A small oil lamp, lent them by the innkeeper, flickers to dance shadows on the walls. A disquieting place for a woman in the throes of childbirth. Far from home. Far from family. Far from what she had expected for her firstborn.

But Mary makes no complaint. It is a relief just to finally get off her feet. She leans back against the wall, her feet swollen, back aching, contractions growing harder and closer together.

Joseph’s eyes dart around the stable. Not a minute to lose. Quickly. A feeding trough would have to make do for a crib. Hay would serve as a mattress. Blankets? Blankets? Ah, his robe. That would do. And those rags hung out to dry would help. A gripping contraction doubles Mary over and sends him racing for a bucket of water.

The birth would not be easy, either for the mother or the child. For every royal privilege for this son ended at conception.

A scream from Mary knifes through the calm of that silent night.

Joseph returns, breathless, water sloshing from the wooden bucket. The top of the baby’s head has already pushed its way into the world. Sweat pours from Mary’s contorted face as Joseph, the most unlikely midwife in all Judea rushes to her side.

The involuntary contractions are not enough, and Mary has to push with all her strength, almost as if God were refusing to come into the world without her help.

Joseph places a garment beneath her, and with a final push, and a long sigh, her labor is over.

The Messiah has arrived.

Elongated head from the constricting journey through the birth canal. Light skin, as the pigment would take days or even weeks to surface. Mucus in his ears and nostrils. Wet and slippery from the amniotic fluid. The son of the Most High God umbilically tied to a lowly Jewish girl.

The baby chokes and coughs. Joseph instinctively turns him over and clears his troat.

Then he cries.

Mary bares her breast and reaches for the shivering baby. She lays him on her chest, and his helpless cries subside. His tiny head bobs around on the unfamiliar terrain. This will be the first thing the infant-king learns. Mary can feel his racing heartbeat as he gropes to nurse.

Deity nursing from a young maiden’s breast. Could anything be more puzzling- or more profound?

Joseph sits exhausted, silent, full of wonder.

The baby finishes and sighs, the divine Word reduced to a few unintelligible sounds. Then, for the first time, his eyes fix on his mother’s. Deity straining to focus. The Light of the World, squinting.

Tears pool in her eyes. She touches his tiny hand. And hands that once sculpted the mountain ranges cling to her finger.

She looks up at Joseph, and through a watery veil, their souls touch. He crowds closer, cheek to cheek with his betrothed. Together they stare in awe at the baby Jesus, whose heavy eyelids begin to close. It has been a long journey. The King is tired.

And so, with barely a ripple of notice, God stepped into the warm lake of humanity. Without protocol and without pretension. Where you would have expected angels, there were only flies. Where you would have expected heads of state, there were only donkeys, a few haltered cows, a nervous ball of sheep, a tethered camel, and a furtive scurry of barn mice.

Except for Joseph, there was no one to share Mary’s pain, or her joy. Yes, there were angels announcing the Savior’s arrival- but only to a band of blue-collar shepherds. And yes, a magnificent star shone in the sky to mark his birthplace- but only three foreigners bothered to look up and follow it.
Thus, in the little town of Bethlehem… that one silent night… the royal birth of God’s Son tiptoed quietly by… as the world slept.

Prayer-

Dear Jesus,

Though there was no room for you in the inn, grant this day that I might make abundant room for you in my heart. Though your own did not receive you, grant me this hour that I may embrace you with open arms. Though Bethlehem overlooked you in the shuffle of the census, grant me the grace, this quiet moment, to be still and know that you are God. You, whose only palace was a stable, whose only throne was a feeding trough, whose only robes were swaddling clothes.
On my knees I confess that I am too conditioned to this world’s pomp and pageantry to recognize God cooing in a manger.
Forgive me. Please. And help me understand at least some of what your birth has to teach- that divine power is not mediated through strength, but through weakness; that true greatness is not achieved through the assertion of rights, but through their release; and that even the most secular of things can be sacred when you are in their midst.
And for those times when you yearn for my fellowship and stand at the door and knock, grant me a special sensitivity to the sound of that knock so I may be quick to my feet. Keep me from letting you stand out in the cold or from ever sending you away to some stable. May my heart always be warm and inviting, so that when you do knock, a worthy place will always be waiting…

everything I need to know about life I learned from running

Well not EVERYTHING of course, but there are quite a few things I have learned from running that are analogous to life. And it would be good for me to clarify that when I use the word ‘life’ I am thinking more in line with the Christian life the Bible calls one to abide by. But I am not allowed enough characters in the title to spell all that out, nor would doing so make for an eye-catching title. So it remains as is.

Just two more notes to make before we are off and ‘running‘ with this post. Readers will need to understand that, like most analogies, the ones below will break down at some point (many will do so rather quickly); so don’t go contemplating these TOO much. But on the surface, there is some truth to be seen (and maybe humor too). As you will quickly conclude, I am no theologian. These are just some of the random things I ponder when I am out there hitting the pavement in the early am, with my thoughts all to myself. Oh and if the length of this rather lengthy post seems intimidating, you can get the gist of it by reading the bold blue bullets and the green references in italic.

Now with all that clarified, are you ready?

On your mark,
get set,
go…

*momentary affliction can lead to joy
Don’t let my love for running fool you; I do not (I repeat, I do not!) consider myself an athletic person. My own body is quite wimpy and is lacking in the necessary fitness level to truly classify myself as one that is strong and in any sort of great shape. But years ago, I had this inkling that joy could be found in running and I set out to find it. However, just being able to jog one mile, without stopping, took a lot of determination and much unpleasant exertion on my part. It was after months and months of running just a little bit further every so often that I could finally make the whole mile at a decent jogger’s pace. For the first time, I was able to say in all honesty that running was indeed enjoyable. Yet that one mile only offered me about 10 minutes of pleasant activity and I wanted more. Off and on through college, and in the early years of marriage, and then after Halle was born, I could labor my way up to a point where I could enjoy a nice 3 mile run on a somewhat regular basis. But after a hiatus in running was necessary for the twin pregnancy and then several more additional weeks for a post delivery recovery, even walking 1/2 a mile was a feat. The idea of ever jogging again seemed impossible! Still there was that memory of the joy that running can bring and I wanted to find it again (especially because I was now a full-time stay at home mom with three kids under three, all still in diapers, and two needing to be nursed many times a day. Yes, having at least a 30 minute slot for some alone mental solace time was something I was on a pursuit for!) There was a 1.5 mile trek from our neighborhood out to I-35 with lots of hills, so I decided that running the total round trip of 3 miles would be a nice goal to aim for. Over the course of about four months, the momentary afflictions of discomfort became less and less as I tried to make it all the way out to the highway and back without walking. And then it happened, one glorious crisp November morning I finally could run there and back the whole way! And I felt great!! Because I had pushed myself (bit by bit) past my comfort zone, I could at last run the distance I wanted. And in doing so there was a new part of daily life that I looked forward to. Getting to enjoy a morning jog, following my quiet time, was/is the perfect start to a day. In other areas of life, apart from running, this truth holds firm as well. When marriage, parenting, the call to disciple our children, homeschooling, serving and loving others have its challenges (and they often do), I have an example in Jesus to endure. Because of the joy that awaits me. “Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:2)”

_{below quote is from the true story account, ‘Lone Survivor’}
*The body can take damn near anything. It’s the mind that needs training.
So running between 3-5 miles a day is very pleasing to me and (most days) I love it! There is joy while I am out on a run and even after I am done. But the prior point about a joy-that-awaits was not to be my motivator when I had the crazy idea that I wanted to run a half-marathon for the first time and then a full-marathon the very next year (and another full this November…) I knew running that far would require lots of training involving many long mile runs and that would, in no shape or form, bring joy to me. There can be little joy during the runs when I am past my comfortable 5 mile mark, still huffing and puffing with many more miles to go. There can be little joy after completing a long run when all muscles are sore for the rest of the day and then into the next. And sadly, even the joy of crossing the finish line of a race I had trained for is not a lasting one, because I see the time it took me and I think ‘aw dang! I wish I could have run that faster_{(you can see my disappointing results here)} .” Nope, the potential for possible joy wouldn’t cut it here and give me something to press on towards when the training was difficult. Instead, it was the idea that I would learn perseverance, persistence, and steadfastness – all traits I know are also necessary in my desire to live a life that glorifies God in what He calls me to as a wife, a mother, and a child of His. Following a training program for a half/full marathon would definitely teach me about commitment and discipline and how to push myself on when the road is hard. On many of the training days, especially those when I am required to run long long distances, my body will scream at me, call me names and send signals of weariness throughout every inch of my body. But I want so badly to be able to finish strong; so I let the perseverance in my mind speak louder than the discomfort in my legs and the burning in my chest. I know that running a marathon does not make me a runner with super abilities (I am convinced that most folks can do likewise – if they want to), it is only by sheer mental determination that I am able to reach the end. It is the training of the mind. And when I am struggling to push on in other areas of life (when the days are hard), I can remember what perseverance feels like (because I have felt it in running) and I know there is strength to continue on. As a Christian, I have this important truth to hold on to. It is the renewing of my mind that is so important in remaining strong in my faith. “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will (Romans 12:2)”

*it is the heart that reveals one’s true capacity for endurance
There is a science that I am trying to learn and understand about the heart’s role in training the body to run further and faster with less effort. I don’t have my mind around it all yet, but I get the fact that the greatest aerobic benefits come when I keep my heart rate at a certain percentage of its maximum. So I wear this heart rate monitor to keep me informed of what percentage I am at during my runs. This just keeps me aware of when I am overextending myself (which is almost never – I am a slow and steady type of girl) or when I am underextending (which is often – and this gadget is letting me know I still can run faster. In essence it is mocking me, saying ‘push harder you wimpy girl!’) I am learning that regardless of what I feel like I can do, it is the condition of my heart that affirms when I am capable of more. But there is a greater truth about the heart when God has been at work there. And I love that I can echo the words of the psalmist when he says,”I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free (Psalm 119:32)”

*If Jesus ate figs, maybe I should too
I know there are many things Jesus did in his life that can be applied in our own lives in a FIG-urative way. But in this case, there really are great benefits for eating figs! And we would profit health wise to follow his example literally. Dried figs are a concentrated, full-of-carbs, nutritious, nice and small little fruit that you can easily keep in your pocket and snack on while when you are in need of more energy (like when running long distances or ‘running’ errands with your kiddos – both can be exhausting!) Even better, they taste good too! Figs help with all those glucose/performance/glycogen/fuel/stamina type things you will often hear mention of in the world of running. Check ‘em out! (see Matthew 21:18-19)

*the shodding of your feet is important
My spending habits will reveal that I demonstrate very little brand loyalty to most items I purchase. When I consider EVERYTHING I spend money on – food, toiletries, clothing, household products – I can think of only three things that are tied to a specific brand in which I will make no substitutes.
One that has nothing to do with running
*Kiss My Face shaving cream (a bummer that I am attached to this stuff because I cannot get it free at CVS…)
Two that are most critical to my running
*Brooks running shoes
*Thorlo micro mini-crew running socks.
I felt a huge difference (in the most positive way) in my running when I was first introduced to Brooks more than 4 years ago and I have been a loyal fan ever since! It is so good that I found some shoes that I love because I have read often enough (and have now experienced for myself) the notion that a good pair of running shoes is the most important piece of equipment for any runner. If a pair of shoes does not meet the needs of support, cushion, and stability for the feet that will be running in them, they can hasten or cause injury. Not good! I want to be able to run for years and years and years to come, therefore I will make whatever investments I need into my shoes so that I am less prone to injury and can keep logging up the miles as long as possible. I have also found that socks can do much for your feet when running too. It is really a matter of preference for each person, but for me (and I’ll try not to sound like a commercial here…) I can find no other style or brand that keep my feet as happy, dry, and blister-free as the thorlo micro mini-crew. So all that to say, I will never compromise on my choice of running shoes or socks because they are foundational to my ability to run. Nor will I compromise my belief in the Gospel as the firm foundation on which I am to stand on in my faith, “…and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace… (Ephesians 6:15)”

*armor isn’t just for the days of knights and castles
To make for a safe and enjoyable run, there are many things I have to adorn myself with before I head out. My usual ‘armor’ involves the following: A Garmin forerunner strapped to my wrist which keeps me informed of the truth of my run (time, distance, heart rate, pace…) There is a monitor across my breastplate, tracking the condition of my heart so I can know that it is justifiable to continue on in exertion. High quality shoes and socks (what I mentioned above) are on my feet. A sun visor serves as my helmet to keeps frizzy stray hair out of my face and to serve as a shield from the sun. I carry a pepper spray dispenser, acting like a sword, to protect against the possible attacks of vicious angry dogs that may be lurking behind the shadows. My ipod has playlists with words and tunes to keep my spirits up and my mind at peace. And if all that were not enough gadgets to make me feel like I am geared up for some sort of special task force secret mission, I also have to add one more item on my really long runs. I have this nifty belt I wear on my waist that allows me to clip on water bottles and fill a pouch with figs and gel shots, allowing me to have easy access to hydration and energy boosters when I need them. I do feel rather silly with all of these at times, but I know how important they are, and I won’t go running with out them. If I can see the importance of how I equip myself just for running, then I should readily understand that in the more significant area of a life of faith, the manner of dress and attire are critical. I need to take heed the instruction from the Bible to don my Christian armor and never be without specific essentials. “Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God (Ephesians 6:13-17)”

*strength comes from the hills
That trek outside our home in San Antonio (mentioned above) had several very steep hills one had to travel up and down to make it out to the highway. I often thought how grueling these obstacles in my path were and would regularly curse their existence (especially during the early months when I first set out to run on them). I would think how much easier running would be and how much faster I could run if there were no hills to make it so darn difficult. But now that I am living out in flatland Manor TX, I actually miss them. When the hills were part of my run everyday, I concluded they were a hindrance. But now that I am without them, I realize how advantageous they really were. Without the daily challenge of running up those great ascents, I have noticed how my endurance has decreased, my muscles have weakened, and my pace is much slower. Hindsight, I finally have appreciation for those hills because running on them forced my muscles to develop and work hard. I wish I knew then what I know now; it is the hills that truly helped me become a stronger runner! So if I want to gain back that strength that has since been lost, extra effort and travel is needed to find some hills to run regularly on because they were, indeed, a good thing. In my Christian faith, I need to realize that the ‘hills’ I am faced with and must endure need not be feared (or cursed) because they can create in me a greater dependence in the Lord and strengthen my faith in Him. And fortunately, I do not have to go looking or travel anywhere to find that strength! “I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth (Psalm 121)”

*alcohol (in moderation) is a good thing
I recently found out that a runner should take in (daily) between 50 and 200 micrograms of food-derived chromium (a mineral that has a role in the metabolizing of carbohydrates for energy). And did you know that beer is a good source of chromium! Yep, one beer contains roughly 60 micrograms of chromium. Nothing like finding more justification to enjoy happy hour… And another ‘happy’ fact worthy of mention is this. To point out one purpose God had when He came up with the idea of another drink I like to enjoy, “He makes… wine that gladdens the heart of man (Psalm 104:14,15)”

*pain in one part of the body is often caused by dysfunction in another part
Last winter I started to undergo LOTS of terrible pain in my left knee when I was running. I kept hoping it would go away, but soon the condition became such a crippling experience that it hurt to even walk. A visit to an orthopedic doctor revealed my weak hip muscles were actually the culprit of the pain in my knee. The treatment I was prescribed entailed a several month break from running and a physical therapy plan that required daily exercises, designed to strengthen those hip muscles. And thank goodness that by improving the issues with my hip, there was a change in the pain in my knees. I could run again! In the case of my knee, the pain I felt there just revealed something was wrong elsewhere. And to make the correlation from running to the spiritual, I think the verse from Titus 3:3 offers a pretty convicting summary of things that are very ‘wrong’ about our human nature when it says we are “‘foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures, living in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another.” But trying to focus on and correct those tendencies will not ultimately fix them or make them go away because they are just the revealers of another dysfunction that is ultimately the culprit in desperate need of a remedy. The underlying problem here is our sin-nature and without the healing and saving power of a Great Physician, we are without hope to be free from its power and consequence. And how sweet and amazing it is to know that God is that Great Physician! And this is just one of the many verses that causes me to rejoice at His healing and saving power!! “But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life (Titus 3:4-7).” This thought about my weakness and God’s strength also reminds me of a passage from the apostle Paul (one of my favorite verses) when he says, “But he [the LORD] said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)”

*when striving for things you love, don’t worry about your aroma
When I come back from running, Halle is always quick to tell me that I need a shower. Sometimes she tries to be polite about her observations as she once said, “You are stinky, but I won’t say you smell like trash.” It’s true. I cannot disagree; ‘you stinketh’ would indeed be the opinion anyone near me will conclude when I come back from running. But there is really nothing I can do about it. Putting on deodorant has no effect of how I smell at the end of a run. And in addition to offering no benefit in odor reduction, I also found that deodorant just turns into foam on my long runs and WILL eventually leak out from under my arms (that causes much more self-consciousness than an unpleasant odor…) So now I forego any attempts to make for a tolerable fragrance. I just decided that I love running and will do it regardless of how it makes me smell and the offense it might cause others. And likewise in my Christian faith, there will be an ‘aroma’ about me as I strive to ‘love the Lord with all my heart, my soul, my mind, and my strength.’ And in doing so, I am not to worry about gaining (or losing) the approval of others. I just know that I love the Lord and what others say or feel about that, so be it. “Now thanks be to God who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and through us diffuses the fragrance of His knowledge in every place. For we are to God the fragrance of Christ among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing. To the one we are the aroma of death leading to death, and to the other the aroma of life leading to life (2 Corinthians 2:14-16)”

*either rest well or train hard
On all the programs I have come across in training for big runs, I find that every week has scheduled one day of complete rest. I see it stated over and over again the importance of recovery time after a week’s work of training. Rest is necessary. Because rather than improving performance by doing activity everyday, one will actually do harm. You can over train your body. Injury, illness, and eventually burnout can all occur when runners do not give themselves a full day of rest. So in order to train hard and do your best, your body needs that FULL day of rest every week-no exceptions! That idea shouldn’t come as a surprise or be a new concept because it is rooted in God’s design. How often I forget that honoring the Sabbath day of rest is one of the 10 commandments (Exodus 20:8)! “There are six days when you may work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath of rest, a day of sacred assembly. You are not to do any work; wherever you live, it is a Sabbath to the LORD (Leviticus 23:3).” I need to remember that this isn’t to be a burden or hindrance but rather a wonderful provision for my welfare!! “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. So the Son of Man is Lord even of the Sabbath (Mark 2:27)”

*the less sedentary one becomes, the more nutrition they require
Studies show that the more active folks become in their running, the more protein their bodies need. It is said that endurance athletes (like runners) should take in .45 to .72 grams of protein per pound of their body weight. Even when you only need to get half of your body weight in grams of protein, that is a lot! I don’t keep track specifically of what my intake is now, I just make sure I add extra supplements than what my usual eating routine would supply. And fortunately there is a way for me to know, for certain, if my protein is at an acceptable level. One perk of donating plasma _{(more on that here)} regularly (apart from the extra spending money I receive. Oh, and the ‘saving lives’ part) is that they do test your protein levels before each donation. Last year (before I knew about an increase in running needing an increase in protein…) I watched my protein levels get so significantly low that I had to stop donating. But now that I know what I need to do in order to keep running strong (and donating plasma), I have to put in the extra effort to give my body the extra protein it needs. And of course this point wouldn’t be mentioned if there were not also some correlating spiritual truth I can liken it to. If we are to become more active and more mature in our faith, we need to increase our intake and understanding and application of God’s word. “Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature… (Hebrews 5:13)”

*don’t compare yourself to others
I don’t normally view myself as a competitive person. Usually it is my own past successes or failures that I weigh my present actions against. But there are those moments every now and then when I do let my mind focus too much (in negative ways) on the achievements of others. I start to resent myself when I dwell too much on where I am lacking and fall short in my comparisons. And in doing so, I lose much of the joy I find in running. I need to remember that every person is different in their abilities as runners, in their motivators, in their goals, and even in their training. It is good for me to be teachable and learn from other runners, to be inspired by their successes! But I need to avoid falling into the snare of comparing myself against others because I will either covet the skills of another runner or I will take pride in some strength I think I have over someone else. Neither are good. And when I am facing the same comparison-type struggles in my Christian faith, the verse I need to remember is this. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men (Colossians 3:23-24)”

*find some running buddies
This is one area that I am still learning about. In my daily 30-45 minute runs, I prefer to run solo. I am very much an introvert and that is my precious and prized alone time and I don’t believe there is anything wrong with that type of solitude. But without fellow runners along side me during this long arduous marathon training thing, I am beginning to suffer from a decline in motivation and my ambition to finish is dwindling. I have no one to really share my struggles or pain with and no one to encourage me on when I am feeling burned out. This is not a pity party, I am just facing the hard fact that I am actually doing myself harm when I try to remain steadfast and committed all on my own. And it should be of no surprise to me that if running has revealed a need for community, then most definitely living in faith does too! I am made more and more aware of my desperate dependence on loving sisters in Christ to help comfort me or spur me on (and for me to be able to do likewise to them). As the following Scriptures will confirm we were made fellowship and there IS strength in numbers. “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works (Hebrews 10:24).”
“So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart (2 Timothy 2:22).” “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ (Galations 6:2).” “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses… let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us (Hebrews 12:1)”

*run with wet socks and you will get blisters
No deep or hidden message here. It is just an unpleasant fact that I have learned the hard way and worth noting! If anyone can find a fun spiritual truth to go along with that point, kudos to you. This may be a stretch, but one verse that could, perhaps, be worked to fit here is this. “Bad company corrupts good character (1 Corinthians 15:33)” _{(you know, because wet socks ‘corrupt’ your feet…)}

***And in conclusion, if I were to sum up everything about running and Christian living with just one mentality to cling to, this would be a great verse! “and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us… (Hebrews 12:1)”

surprising joys from fish and bread

I love the many unexpected blessings of the Lord and how His grace desires to give us more than we could ever ask or imagine!

I had been thinking lately (not ardently-on-my-knees praying, just kind of thinking in the back of my brain) about several seemingly unrelated areas like
*recognizing the need for me to start journaling again during my quiet times
*feeling somewhat disgruntled at the things I want to do but cannot because I am constantly with little ones that can’t take care of themselves (rotten, yes I know!)
*fretting this upcoming year of homeschooling challenges like schedules and curricullums to use and questioning if I even would/could be able to teach the girls effectively

But all of these things were just sort of stirring in the back of my mind and weighing on my heart without much action on my part to actually address them.

And then this morning, something huge happened that addressed all three of these pressing areas. I was just about to put off journaling one more day because I was already settled, cozy and comfy, in my chair with a steaming big cup of coffee and I didn’t want to get up and go find my journal, buried somewhere in a drawer by my bed. I’ll find it later today, I reasoned, and then tomorrow I will start. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow.

Well it didn’t work out that way and am I ever glad that my plans were thwarted. Rob called for me to help him with something in the bedroom, so I had to get up and go back to the room where my journal had rested dormant without any activity for such a long time. I couldn’t NOT pull it out of hiding now. So I brought it back to my chair, wondering if I would even be able to come up with something to write about since I knew I was going to be reading just another old and familiar Jesus story in the book of Matthew. Now I should know by now there is nothing “old-and-familiar” when it comes to the living and active word of God, but I was in one of my hardened heart-moods and feeling unteachable. But thanks be to God that He isn’t hindered by my poor begrudging attitude and He still did the impossible in regards to my state of mind this morning.

I am not sure how many times I have heard the story of Jesus feeding the five thousand with only five loaves of bread and two fish, but today I received those words as fresh and new. And an absolutely incredible application was revealed FOR ME (I have to say that in a way that stands out to readers because, again, this insight was FOR ME. And while others can maybe take something away for themselves, I am in no way shape or form secretly holding anyone accountable for what touched MY heart today. I know that God doesn’t have the same plans for each of us. So with that said, I’ll dive into what God called to MY attention today…)

These are the verses from Matthew 14:13-21 that I wrote about in my journal. When Jesus heard it, He departed from there by boat to a deserted place by Himself. But when the multitudes heard it, they followed Him on foot from the cities. And when Jesus went out He saw a great multitude; and He was moved with compassion for them, and healed their sick. When it was evening, His disciples came to Him, saying, “This is a deserted place, and the hour is already late. Send the multitudes away, that they may go into the villages and buy themselves food.” But Jesus said to them, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.” And they said to Him, “We have here only five loaves and two fish.” He said, “Bring them here to Me.” Then He commanded the multitudes to sit down on the grass. And He took the five loaves and the two fish, and looking up to heaven, He blessed and broke and gave the loaves to the disciples; and the disciples gave to the multitudes. So they all ate and were filled, and they took up twelve baskets full of the fragments that remained. Now those who had eaten were about five thousand men, besides women and children.

I was first drawn to the part about the inadequacy the disciples most certainly felt when Jesus told them to feed the 5,000 people with just a few bits of bread and fish. So often when I look at the Lord’s callings through my own eyes, I can somewhat relate to the disciples’ awareness of their own meagerness and I feel overwhelmed by many things the Lord places on my heart. And the first area that immediately came to mind while reading this morning was God’s call for OUR FAMILY to educate our girls at home. Because when I look at this through my own abilities and limited resources, it is indeed a daunting thing. And even though I don’t doubt that calling, I do often feel the heavy weight of the responsibility it entails and am easily dismayed. But it was the feeding-the-five-thousand verses that helped put my fears in proper perspective. When the disciples looked at Jesus’ command to feed the all those people, they looked at their own means and ability and thought ‘no way!’ But with God, nothing is impossible. He will equip those He has called (and not necessarily always call the equipped). It was after Jesus gave thanks and broke the bread when God did His wonders. And so for me, one application was to know that when the task of teaching and training my own children seems overwhelming and at times downright impossible, I need to remember the outcome of this story. After my offering up thankfulness that God has given me the responsibility to raise these precious girls and being broken by God for this task, I can be part of the hand of God in ‘feeding’ my own children sufficiently when I trust in God to do it.

That was application number one.

Interestingly the application I saw first was in the second part of the story, and the second application I saw actually came when I re-read the first part of the story. With me? Anyways, I think God first needed me to see that my inadequacy mattered not in the big scheme of His ability to provide. And when I am overwhelmed about what it requires of time and patience and diligence to educate our kids at home, I need to fall back on the knowledge I have of God’s provision and know that He will equip me as a parent to carry out the responsibility of raising His children. Because when I have that first part down, any other lingering selfishness and desires for me-time that would tempt me to throw in the towel because ‘it is just too hard’ won’t have such a strong foothold on me. The first part of this story makes note that Jesus had plans of His own, He desired time alone and was seeking to make that happen. And Like Jesus, I can relate on both of those points. I too have my own plans and I want time for me (can I get an ‘amen sister’ from my fellow moms!) But what struck me is Jesus’ response when His plans were interrupted (which is not like me…). “He was moved with compassion for them” When my plans are interrupted or when I start thinking I won’t be able to do what I want to do because I am at home all the time, it was convicting and yet refreshing to look at Jesus’ response and see the compassion He had to heal and feed the people. God has blessed me with children who are also desperately needing to be healed and fed and they are looking for me to do that. Oh that my heart would be filled with compassion and that I would see the wonderful magnitude of the fact that God can and will equip me with His strength, He will work in me a love that leads to the action that will ‘heal and feed’ them. Jesus set His own desires aside for the sake of others. And how precious are those ‘others’ in my life. How can I not follow in Jesus’ example.

So those were three wonderful joys of my morning. I know not every journaling experience will produce such results, but to think what I might be missing out on when I don’t allow time to really process and meditate on what the Lord can reveal through His word. I have new motivation to persevere with journaling AND on the path of homeschooling. For that I am grateful!

****************
In case you are interested, here is a little bit more on what I believe whole-heartedly as the conviction/calling from the Lord on OUR FAMILY to educate our children at home. The verses that God used to clearly put this plan for OUR FAMILY on hearts was from Deuteronomy 6:4-7. “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. ‘And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.“ The words ‘diligently teach your children’ carried much weight because they immediately followed the greatest command in the whole Bible. I saw how the theme of time was woven into verse seven with the whens and hows of what diligently teaching involves. And God made it clear (to me) that the most effective way (for Rob and me) to make much of these verses (with my family) was to spend as much time in the presence of my girls; teaching them God’s word and His truths, making known God’s love and His commands, discipling them in character traits, instilling in them a heart to serve others… On and on the list continued, all requiring lots and lots of time. And I was burdened with the realization that all the time being away at school would mean time lost to teaching them diligently. Then on the flip side by having them at home, much much much more could be taught to them using God as the center and basis for all the knowledge they are to obtain (because “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge” Prov 1:7) And so in countless ways, this is the route God has shown OUR FAMILY to follow, to best honor the verses in Deuteronomy. And please don’t miss that I said ‘our family’ and ‘me’ and ‘my’ again and again. It is what He put into Rob and my hearts to do. Just like God might use the verse from James 1:27 concerning orphans to give someone a heart to adopt from China or the verses at the end of Matthew to make disciples as a way to prompt someone to travel overseas and do mission work, this is OUR prompting and I know not every family will have the same.

Not fair or More Fair?

Life’s not fair!!

Oh that familiar phrase; one that so easily serves as both a way to complain and a means to justify how things seem to go in life. And it is with the latter usage that I am speaking it more and more often as a way to warrant all unpleasant situations my girls continue to gripe about. Those three words, “life’s not fair” just seem to slip out of my mouth a bit too quickly these recent days. The frequent complaint, “why does SHE get to __ __ __ and not ME (fill in the blanks with whatever)?” is taxing as I hear it over and over again, umpteen times a day. So I throw out what seems to be the quickest fix to try and resolve those disputes; and I say, life’s not fair! I want to get into those little minds, as early as possible, that life doesn’t always go the way they want it to; because it doesn’t. And even though I refuse to use it in context of the unemployment situation (which has dragged on well past a month now), the increase in the use of these words towards my girls most likely reveals a part of me that ascribes our current woes to a bottom line reasoning that suggests “life’s not fair”.

But is it really? Is life not fair? Or is there a better way to look at the undesired we face and must accept in this world? But before you decide, I think you should read the following. It is a short story from a favorite author of mine, Brian Andreas (you can see his work if you click here)

They left me with your shadow, saying things like Life is not fair

and I believed them for a long time.

But today, I remembered the way you laughed & the heat of your hand in mine

and I knew that life is more fair than we can ever imagine if we are there to live it

Don’t you just love that? Didn’t it strike a new chord in your heart? I hope you say yes. Because that bottom line message is so true. Now I cannot even begin to imagine or comprehend what it means to lose a loved one, but I know that we can all recognize in times when we are saddened by what we cannot have or by what we have lost that there is a better way to see life. I do see the value in realizing that I have so much to be thankful for and that I am blessed in so many many ways. I need to be ever mindful of that; and to see the good I get to experience every day that I live!! And in an attempt to sum up with just two pictures (there were hundreds to choose from) my biggest source of blessings, here are 4 reasons why I am 100% in agreement with the beautiful truth in these lines.

and I knew

that life

is more fair

than we

can ever

imagine

if we are

there to

live it

vomit + broken shop vac = a visit to church (using providential math to see the good)

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

As time marches on to the tune of uncertainty, emotions chime in and out with unsteady beats. The melody of hope is often interrupted with sporadic spurts of sorrow and despair. Tears and anger chime in and out, creating an unbalanced harmony in our home. But through it all God allows a comforting chorus to echo in our hearts, mainly that He is in control and we can trust in His plan for our lives.

The verse in Romans above is one that is bringing me much comfort during this period of unemployment. To understand there is a bigger plan and a greater purpose offers much consolation. And even though it would be a relief to claim that this ‘good’ is for us in terms of worldly prosperity, I know there is something more significant in the midst here. It is for God’s good and His glory to which all things work. I am reminded of so many past instances where God used the unpleasant to orchestrate something better in the end. To think on those circumstances, and see the ‘good’ that came out of them, helps me have hope that these present hard times will be used in a mighty way.

Without this perspective, it would be hard to see how the undesirable act of cleaning up your own child’s throw up could ever be a factor in any sort of equation with a gratifying outcome. But it was. Not too long ago, Halle had an upset stomach that led to an ejection of a spewing yuck all over her bedroom carpet. But when the shop vac was pulled out to be of assistance in the vomit removal process, it was found to be ‘temporarily out of service.’ Oops and uh-oh for me as the diagnosis turned out to be FEMALE operator error; the broken state was due to a lack of proper storage and cleanup from the last time it had been used (coincidentally in cleaning up another child’s throw up). So one can see that things are not looking good for the culprits at play here (the throw up and the wife who last used the shop vac…). But after several phone calls to nearby neighbors, a shop vac was discovered. And it was upon the retrieval of a working device that a conversation with the owner was initiated; and that ultimately led to an invitation to accompany our family to church. In the end, it was not necessarily our good that came about because of these troublesome scenarios, but the good of a family that has been able to visit a great church on several occasions because of our unfortunate events. And I know that behind the scenes here and now, God is at work for a good that I wait with expectation to see!!

For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory forever! Amen (Romans 11:36)